DAVE MAGARITY: THE PORTLY AND STOUT PAGE: College Basketball Mid-Major Top 25 poll, coach columns, Fashionable Four and more.





 

 

 
THE WOMEN OF BOND
On the first day of Christmas Santa gave to me, Pussy Galore. I think it is safe to say that this gift would satisfy even the biggest of holiday appetites. Honor Blackman doesn't show up in "Goldfinger" until the end of the film, but saving the best for last is always a terrific touch.  It's one of the all-time great lines, when Bond (Sean Connery) wakes up to see Ms. Galore standing over him. She tells him that she is Pussy Galore, to which he responds, "I must be dreaming." Outstanding!   [ READ ]
 
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Only Dave Magarity could find a way to combine the beauty of America's Pastime and the beauty of Raquel Welch into one feature. Magarity takes a closer look at Ms. Welch and some of the best Baseball movies ever made.  [ READ ]

Coach Magarity's movie review craze all began with a simple critique of the film inspired by Sebastian Junger's book. It's  "The Perfect Storm," starring George Clooney and co-starring Jeff Ruland and Dave Magarity?  [
READ ]
 
 
   
 


With all due respect to Mike Krzyzewski, there is only one Duke. John Wayne is a legend. Certainly his swagger and un-phased demeanor are still present today in beautiful Poughkeepsie, New York on the campus of Marist College. 
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In case you may have missed the announcement, RCA has released a new CD, containing Elvis' 30 greatest hits. I plan on dusting off my rhinestone suit, slipping on my blue suede shoes, gluing on the old side burns and heading down to the store to pick up my copy. 
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Horror fans across the country will love this one. There is no question in my mind that this is a work of film art. It?s Bruce Lee clashing with Bram Stoker. It?s a theatrical masterpiece,  ?The Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires.? 
[ READ ]

 

          

REPORTER: How did you feel about getting the win?

COACH: To be honest, I am kind a pissed off. I was hoping to get back home so I could watch "Joe Millionaire." Now I have to stay and coach another game.

REPORTER: Your team was very animated after the win. Can you talk about that?

COACH: They were just happy as hell that they didn't have to have watch "Joe Millionaire" with me.

REPORTER: How big is this win for your program?

COACH: Well, it was nice, but our men's intramural cricket team won their first-ever match today.

REPORTER: Your next opponent will present a lot of problems for you. Do you think you have a chance?

COACH: Hell, you're right we've got no shot so we'll probably just skip the game and get back to campus.

REPORTER: What was the key to the win?

COACH: We scored more points.  [ READ ENTIRE FEATURE ]

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THE FRENCH DISCONNECTION
Moving right along, our next feature film is "Rugrats in Paris," which centers on the pre-school tone of the country's foreign affairs policy. Terrific for the kids and adults will chuckle at the antics of the characters, including "Chucky," played by Jacques Chirac.
   
THE SIGNS
When you are walking through the mall in December and a young child asks if you are Santa Claus; that is a sign that you are a member of the "Portly and Stout" club. Each of us probably has a long list of "signs," which can be very telling as to the day's outcome.
   
MAGARITY'S MEAN MACHINE
I tell you what, you put me at one tackle and Iona's Jeff Ruland at the other end of the line and that would be a pretty impressive set of bookends. That gave me the idea to assemble my own squad, which will take on all comers. So lets go to war.
   
THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT
"A Miracle on 34th Street" and "The Grinch" are family favorites, but they won't be viewed in front of a roaring fire in the Magarity household. Instead, my lovely wife and three children will join me for "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians."