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The East is FINALLY Set
By Angela LentoCLICK HERE FOR EARLIER RESULTS
A large crowd gathered with the announcement that the action in the East would finally be contested on the catwalk.
Some of the winners from other regions were on hand, including a very confident Portland State assistant.
“My gear is fly, I just close my eyes and pull something out of my closet,” said Brian Loyd (pictured) who will face UCLA’s Michael Holton in the West Regional final.
“I'm not worried about him,” laughed Loyd. “I know Michael and he's a very dapper individual, but he's used to getting beat by the big sky conference. I'm looking forward to advancing to the Fancy Four.”
Holton was busy preparing for the Bruins first round matchup with Hofstra and was unavailable for comment.
Other assistants wanted to talk about their upcoming contests, but loud bellows from the back distracted everyone.
“America’s best-looking big man is here. Where the hell is Ruland.”
It was none other than Marist coach Dave Magarity who had finally arrived at the East Region to support his candidate, Steve Sauers (pictured).
“I was recruiting,” said Magarity. “I got word of the events taking place here while I was waiting to catch a flight home. When I was told about the actions of [Jeff] Ruland I told the airline to bump me into the quickest and most direct flight. I am outraged at the way Steve [Sauers] and Eugene [Burroughs] have been treated.”
As you may recall, Marist assistant Burroughs was completely psyched out by Ruland and his staff while trying to complete his catwalk contest with Hofstra’s Tom Perora. And Pecora’s victory was kind of short-lived. Ruland held a press conference to announce that Pecora was mysteriously withdrawing from the field, just one shoe short of the ‘Fancy Four.’
Even more eye opening was the fact that Pecora’s replacement would be Rob O’Driscoll, Ruland’s assistant.
“First of all I want to know how Ruland can possibly think that his staff his deserving of consideration,” said Magarity. “That is the most bizarre looking group I have ever seen. Craig Holcomb looks like ‘Opey’ all grown up and Tony Chiles is doing re-runs of ‘Different Strokes.’ The guy is Gary Coleman in his adult years.”
Magarity had enough confidence in Sauers, no matter who the opponent, so he did not waiver at the idea of Ruland’s assistant taking the place of Tom Pecora on the catwalk. However, he did have some parting thoughts for Ruland, as he prepared to do battle with Ole Miss in the NCAA Tournament.
“I want to congratulate Jeff on an outstanding season and wish him the best of luck in the tournament, but I am a little taken back with his comments about me being chubby. There is no question in my mind who is the better looking and the more fit individual.”
Ruland gave some words of advice to O’Driscoll and took a seat to watch the action. He peered over at Magarity, but the Marist coach was unabashed.
“That intimidation might have worked with Eugene, but it’s not working with me. Why don’t you put Ruland and me in a room and lock the door. I guarantee that it will be me who emerges. I might just rip that shark skinned suit right off his back.”
After all the hype leading up to the Sauers vs. O’Driscoll contest, the action on the catwalk had to be disappointing. It was all over early. Sauers cruised past the Iona assistant and was now a ties’ length away from the ‘Fancy Four.’
“I am real happy for Iona and their fans,” said Sauers. “They will represent the MAAC very well in the tournament. As for the fashion tournament, they are way out of line. Coach Ruland and his staff are just jealous that our staff is so well dressed and so good looking. They really had no shot.”
So after almost five days of lay over, the first half of the ‘Elegant Eight’ in the East was determined.
Next to take the stage were the lovely Stephanie Ready (Coppin State) and Mike Jarvis II (St. John’s).
Deuce had a sensational regular-season showing, spending the past two months in the top ten. Coach Ready had a popped into the rankings on a couple of occasions, climbing as high as No. 4, which was better than the best FPI of Jarvis.
“He has that all business look, nothing flashy or out of the norm,” said Stephanie. “He’s very conservative and has that attorney look. I don’t ever remember seeing him in anything trendy, which could be good or bad for me. Trends are great if you can put them together and they are up-to-date, but they are also looked upon as not being classy. Women can wear trends better than men.”
The St. John’s contingent looked nervous as the action unfolded. Just a few strides into the catwalk contest a cry came out of the back -- “Nobody is beating Stephanie.” My fashion assistant claims that it was Fang Mitchell.
By halftime, it appeared that Fang was right. Coach Ready had built a huge lead. The St. John’s assistant came out pressed for the first five minutes of the second half, but Stephanie handled the pressure well.
In the end, her beauty was too much for Deuce to overcome.
So it would be Coppin State vs. Marist for the right to go the ‘Fancy Four.’
As for coach Magarity, he was off to the site of the ‘Photo Shoot-Around’ being held for the 65 head coaches who would be competing on ‘The Runway to the Fashionable Four.’
Here is the schedule of events and the updated brackets:
March 20: Field reduced to ‘Fancy Four’
March 22: Field reduced to ‘Trendy Two’
March 26: Best-Dressed Assistant Coach is announced.
EAST
Steve Sauers (Marist) vs. Stephanie Ready (Coppin State)Note that Hofstra's Tom Pecora has been replaced Iona's Rob O'Driscoll.
Steve Sauers (Marist) defeated Rob O'Driscoll (Iona)
Stephanie Ready (Coppin State) defeated Mike Jarvis II (St. John’s)
Steve Sauers (Marist) defeated Keith Bike (Sacred Heart)
Tom Pecora (Hofstra) defeated Eugene Burroughs (Marist)
Stephanie Ready (Coppin State) defeated Bobby Collins (Hampton)
Mike Jarvis II (St. John’s) defeated Garland Mance (Kent State)
WEST
Michael Holton (UCLA) vs. Brian Loyd (Portland State)
Michael Holton (UCLA) defeated Ronny Thompson (Georgetown)
Brian Loyd (Portland State) defeated Brian O’Neill (Baylor)
Ronny Thompson (Georgetown) defeated Rob Jeter (UW-Milwaukee)
Michael Holton (UCLA) defeated Cameron Dollar (Saint Louis)
Brian O’Neill (Baylor) defeated Lew Hill (Texas A&M)
Brian Loyd (Portland State) defeated Bobby Kummer (Texas A&M)
MIDWEST
Tom Schuberth (SE Missouri State) vs. Darby Rich (Sam Houston State)
Tom Schuberth (SE Missouri State) defeated Jeff Battle (Xavier)
Darby Rich (Sam Houston State) defeated Jennifer Johnston (Oakland)
Tom Schuberth (SE Missouri State) defeated James Stafford (Duquesne)
Jeff Battle (Xavier) defeated Keith LeGree (Cincinnati)
Jennifer Johnston (Oakland) defeated Scott Drew (Valparaiso)
Darby Rich (Sam Houston State) defeated Darren Savino (New Mexico)
SOUTH
Mike Young (Wofford) vs. Byron Samuels (Tennessee)
Mike Young (Wofford) defeated Mike Gillian (George Mason)
Byron Samuels (Tennessee) defeated James Wilhelmi (Maryland-E.S.)
Mike Young (Wofford) defeated Jay Hickson (Campbell)
Mike Gillian (George Mason) defeated Rodney Terry (NC-Wilmington)
James Wilhelmi (Maryland-E.S.) defeated Monte Ross (St. Joseph’s)
Byron Samuels (Tennessee) defeated Alvin Williamson (Tulane)
Note: The 32-Assistant Coach field was selected among the 100 plus under studies, which were nominated by their head coach or sports information director. In order to be considered an assistant MUST have met that criteria.
(Head Coach: 3-8-2002) 1. Bruiser Flint
2. John Calipari
3. Gary Waters
4. Willis Wilson
5. Jay Wright
6. Paul Graham
7. Tubby Smith
8. Rick Pitino
9. Melvin Watkins
10.Mike JarvisPlaying Catch with Satchel Paige
The Captivating Conference Champions
Coach Brent Encourages Players to Build Professional Look
The Renaissance Man and Wrestling Alligators
Coaches Give Fashion Statements on Coaches
A Look at New Jersey's Stylish Coaches
Feb 4 FPI: John Calipari Remains No. 1
Sideline Style Poll is Clothes Call
Being No. 1 Suits Rutgers' Gary Waters Just Fine
Jan 21 FPI: John Calipari Tops Fashion Power Index
Carter, Felton, Lutz and Scruggs Combine Coaching and Style
Terry Gets Rave Reviews in North Carolina
Jan 7 FPI: Gary Waters Tops Fashion Power Index
Though Styles Differ, Smith and Pitino at Top of Their Game
December FPI: Georgetown and Drexel Top The Lists
Jesse "The Body" Ventura and a Kid at Delaware
Musical Talent in Kansas and Wyoming
The FPI, The Natural and a 7-Footer from Wal-Mart
Pennsylvania: America’s Most Stylish State
In Search of Bigfoot with Dale Brown
Auctioning off Auburn coach Cliff Ellis
UCLA's Steve Lavin Talks Fashion
John Feinstein Plugs Fashionable Four
(Assistant: 3-8-2002) 1. Wayne Brent
2. Gary Stewart
3. Steve Sauers
4. Ronny Thompson
5. Tony Jones
6. Patrick Sellers
7. Reggie Hanson
8. Lew Hill
9. Tom Schuberth
10.Jennifer Johnston
AMERICA EAST:
Tom Brennan
ATLANTIC COAST:
Skip Prosser
ATLANTIC SUN:
Don Maestri
ATLANTIC 10:
Bob Hill
BIG EAST:
Gary Waters
BIG SKY:
Joel Sobotka
BIG SOUTH:
Pete Strickland
BIG TEN:
Jerry Dunn
BIG 12:
Melvin Watkins
BIG WEST:
Kevin Bromley
COLONIAL:
Bruiser Flint
CONFERENCE-USA:
John Calipari
HORIZON:
Ed Schilling
IVY LEAGUE:
James Jones
METRO ATLANTIC:
Don Harnum
MID-AMERICAN:
Stan Joplin
MID-CONTINENT:
Homer Drew
MID-EASTERN:
Cy Alexander
MISSOURI VALLEY:
Barry Hinson
MOUNTAIN WEST:
Charlie Spoonhour
NORTHEAST:
Bobby Jones
OHIO VALLEY:
Kyle Macy
PACIFIC-10:
Paul Graham
PATRIOT LEAGUE:
Sal Mentesana
SOUTHEASTERN:
Tubby Smith
SOUTHERN:
Bob McKillop
SOUHTLAND:
Mike Deane
SOUTHWESTERN:
Lafayette Stribbling
SUN BELT:
Dennis Felton
WEST COAST:
Michael Holton
WESTERN ATHLETIC
Willis Wilson
Take a stroll down last season's Runway to the Fashionable Four
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